Apologies to Poor Old Michael Finnegan

There was a man who studied finches, then
He wrote a book about their Origin,
Now we have the Theory of Evolution
This must make me a Charles Darwinian.

There was a man who served and once again,
He said “Twice is ‘nuff for President.”
I wave Bush Bye with a great big grin,
I am a proud George Washingtonian.

I once was riding on my brand new Schwinn,
I fell down and scrapped my shin again,
I didn’t float off into space expansionin’
‘Cause I am an Isaac Newtonian.

I ate a burger at a Bennigans’
Had no credit; My fate was very grim,
Lucky my wallet still had a couple fins
Happily they are Alex Hamiltonians.

I wrote this once; I’m writing once again,
My system monitor went all blue screenin’
Banged away with Control-Alt-Deletin’
Damn! I hate being Bill Gatesian.

I’m not so sure about this new labelin’
Just ‘Cause some person got to wonderin’
Times have changed; Ideas are improvin’
Yet I am still called a “Darwinian.”